I'm gonna be sick . . . (just kidding; I'm not)

Can I talk to you for a sec? It'll just be a minute.

Do you ever feel like you're on a roller coaster and you can't get off? Once when I was a kid we went to this place called Hoffman's Playland. We used to go there on our way home from Lake George, NY. Anyway, it was a really small amusement park thing and they had a very small roller coaster but it made very sharp turns to make up for the fact that it was small and it went around 3 times. I went on it once. I have no idea how old I was, maybe 9? Anyway, I freaked out so much that they actually had to stop it to let me off before that last time around. I kind of feel like that right now. "This is freaking me out. I'm not ready for this. I need to get off and get my feet on the ground."

How does life change this quickly anyway? I mean, what is up with that? It's like with my new job. I got a phone call about it on a Monday, had the interview on Wednesday, and had the job by Friday. I went from being a starving-artist-slash-part-time-stay-at-home-aunt to having the perfect job for me and it just came to me. Weird.

Today my life flip flopped big time. And all in a matter of hours. I'm not going to go into details because it involves other people. What I will say is that some of it threw me for a complete loop and some didn't. I mean if I had stood back at what was slowly unfolding, I probably would have seen it coming (especially because I'm really good at that with movie plots most of the time). The thing is that it's not like my job where it was easy to know how to feel about it. Instead I'm a ball of nerves and emotions that I don't have time to sort out because we're gearing up for the third time around this ride and I'm just really not sure I want to stay on. The last two go arounds seemed fun at first, but ended up being doozies and I'm thinking I might need a break.

Ok, that's it. I just needed to vent and you were the only one up at this hour. Thanks a bunch! Here's to hoping that I'll be able to get some sleep. Also I apologize that I'm rambling. It's late.

Mormon Lexicon: Some of the basics

Here it is: the beginning of the long - awaited (I know you've been waiting) Mormon Lexicon! And you thought I forgot . . .

I decided to put together this dictionary of sorts to put you in the loop. This will explain some of the terms I am bound to use while telling a story (as I am a Mormon that has experiences with other Mormons especially now that I live in Utah where they're - I mean we're - everywhere). The fact of the matter is that this will take a number of posts to fully explain. I thought I'd give it to you in smaller chunks so it would be easier for you to swallow (we wouldn't want anyone choking, now would we?) So don't be surprised to see additional installments in the future. I would like to say up front, that though I will poke some fun at our lingo and weird cultural stuff, I believe in the doctrine very strongly. Tone in the written word is sometimes difficult to make out, so I will say right now that unless I specifically indicate, I am not being sarcastic. Most of these jokes will be the kind that are said with a small chuckle. Included in this first edition will be some of the basics of organization and Sunday meetings in our church. Enjoy!

Mormon: 1. Mormon was a prophet in the ancient Americas who abridged the writings of not one, but two ancient civilizations and put them into a record that later became known as The Book of Mormon. It was named after him, because he did a whole lot of the work. Better give credit where credit is due! (Note: Joseph Smith didn't write The Book of Mormon. It was already written . . . in another language . . . that no one knew how to read. This is why God called Joseph Smith to translate it by the power of God.)

2. A nickname for a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. People started calling us Mormons because we read The Book of Mormon. By the way, we don't mind being called Mormons, but we don't really like our church being called "the Mormon church" because it makes people think we worship Mormon instead of Jesus Christ.

LDS or Latter-day Saint: another nickname for a Mormon. The term, "latter-day saint" does not suggest that the members of our church have achieved sainthood (not even close!). We point to the way the term "saint" is used in the New Testament to refer to members of the early Christian church. Basically we are members of Jesus Christ's church in later days.

ward: a congregation of Mormons in a geographic area. A ward is like a family. Sometimes it's a little crazy, but we love and support each other. In some areas there are specialized wards like singles wards, deaf wards, Spanish wards, Tongan wards, etc. These specialized wards are not created to exclude people, instead they are formed when the leadership finds that the specialization better meets the needs of those ward members especially when it comes to language. Wards are usually split when they get too big. A smaller group is better than a larger one because it is easier to know everyone and their needs. It also gives more people the opportunity to hold callings.

calling: the job/responsibility that you do/have in the church. All worthy members of our church get to help out by serving in a calling. A calling is not paid work; it is service. There are numerous callings in a ward and you can even get a calling that has you serving at the stake, regional, or general level. Callings range from Bishop to Sunday School teacher to greeter to librarian to Prophet. The key is that each calling is important. And though there are different callings with different levels of responsibility, you don't get "promoted". You may go from being in charge of a lot of stuff to teaching 5 year-olds and it is not a demotion. We believe that the call comes through inspiration aka God is choosing what you are doing right now. And because there are so many things to do and you usually don't stay in a calling forever, you have the chance to learn . . . a LOT. I recently taught a Sunday School class entitled "Marriage and Family Relations" to other young, single members of my ward. I loved it. I learned so much while preparing my lessons and from the comments I got from those who attended my class. What a great way to have a positive outlook on something that has so long eluded me! The Lord sure knows what he is doing.

bishop: the bishop is the ecclesiastical leader of the ward, kind of like a pastor. The father of the ward family, if you will. He is actually responsible for everyone within his ward's boundaries whether they are a member of our church or not. Our church has a lay ministry meaning that the bishop is not paid. He has a regular day job to support his family (oh yeah and celibacy is not promoted in our faith. Family is the most important thing for everyone). A bishop may be a lawyer, accountant, garbageman, artist, etc. to pay the bills and then spend 20 hours a week fulfilling his duties as bishop. Bishops really do work so hard. My dad was the bishop for a while and it was tiring work. The good news is that this calling is not forever. Usually a bishop serves for about 5 years. After that, someone else is called.

bishopric: a group of men including the bishop, his two counselors, the executive secretary and clerks. The other members beside the bishop help him do his job. Yay for teamwork!

branch: a branch is like a ward, but smaller.

branch president: the branch president does everything a bishop does, he's just called a branch president because he's over a branch instead of a ward.

stake: a larger geographical area that includes usually about 7-10 wards. The term comes from the analogy used in the Old Testament that the House of Israel was like a tent with stakes spread out.

stake president: a priesthood leader that presides over a stake. Like a bishop, he has two counselors an executive secretary and clerks to help him do his job. The stake president also works really hard and spends a lot of hours on his calling. This is actually what my dad is now. This calling isn't forever either, but the average stake president serves for about 10 years. My dad isn't quite half way there yet. You can do it, Dad! (As you can see, you really don't hope and dream for leadership positions, they take a lot of time and often those who are called feel inadequate for the job, but whom the Lord calls, he qualifies. Each opportunity to serve brings faith building experiences as you rely upon the Lord to help you figure out how to do the job right.)

stake center: the building dedicated to holding stake events. It also serves as a meeting house for at least one ward.

3 hour block: our Sunday meetings last for three hours. I know what you're thinking, "THREE HOURS?!?! Are these people crazy?" But the truth is that it is broken up into three meetings: Sacrament Meeting, Sunday School and the last hour one is either in Priesthood, Relief Society, Young Womens, or Primary (all of these groups will be discussed in later posts.)

Sacrament Meeting: the worship service where all the congregation meets together. The meeting starts with a welcome, then a hymn sung by the congregation and a prayer offered by a member of the congregation who has been asked beforehand. After the prayer, business is conducted (if there is any) and then another hymn is sung to prepare for the sacrament. Sacrament hymns are usually solemn and reverent and the words speak of Jesus Christ and how he suffered for our sins. The most important part of Sacrament Meeting is the sacrament. The sacrament is when bread and water are blessed and passed to the congregation. It is much like the eucharist or communion in other faiths. The bread and water are symbols of Christ's flesh and blood as he explained during the last supper. The sacramental prayer reminds us of the covenants (promises with God) we made when we were baptized. After the sacrament, talks are given by 2 or three members of the congregation who were asked beforehand (usually you get at least a week to prepare unless your dad is the bishop and the person scheduled can't do it for some reason or another). There is usually a rest hymn in between talks which is a chance to stand up and stretch your legs (sometimes). In my current ward, we stand up for the rest hymn EVERY week, which I hadn't experienced before. The meeting closes with another hymn and a closing prayer. Yes, we sing a lot. Which I really don't mind even though I have a terrible voice. The hymns are so beautiful and are so much a part of me, that I love to hear them. Besides, usually there are a lot of people in the ward that have beautiful voices, so I get to hear them sing over my voice.

the church vs. The Church: 1. the actual structure or building where services and activities are held i.e.: "will you be at the church tonight?"

2. short for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints i.e.: "How members of The Church are there worldwide?"

Well that's it for now, please. If any of this confuses you or if you would like to put in a request (you've heard a Mormon say something that didn't make any sense to you) leave a comment or shoot me an email.

She lives!

Hey Remember how I used to be a blogger? I guess I forgot . . . the truth is that my social life got super interesting and involved. I know you're intrigued! You should be! Too bad I'm not talking!!!!!!!

Anyway, Nat the Fat Rat is doing another giveaway and this one has nothing to do with me except that I would love to win it. It is a $100 gift card to HomeGoods! Go ahead and enter for a chance to win. If I win, I want a new temple in which to house my shoe shrine. I came to the realization as I returned home Saturday with two new pairs of shoes that this problem of shoe space is only going to get worse now that I am gainfully employed.

I think I'm going to be blogging again soon as I will have a little time while I'm visiting home. Love you all!

The Golden Age of Hollywood

Last night while staying up too late (again), the thought came into my head. "When is it going to be doppelganger week again on Facebook?" It seems like a long time since the last one, doesn't it? Well, in times like these I turn to my trusty source for all things pop culture and completely trivial: Wikileaks, oops . . . I mean Wikipedia! The trusted Wikipedia told me that Doppelganger Week (don't you think it should be capitalized?) is the first week in February. Why, that is NOW! No wonder it seems so long; it's been a whole year.

The reason this is so funny is that on Sunday night at ward prayer (don't worry guys - I'm working on a lexicon of Mormon lingo for those of you who are not familiar), everyone was asked to think about who would play them in a movie version of themselves and then share it with the group. This, of course, was just an excuse to get people talking as ward prayer is really just a ploy to get those crazy singles to date! Well, I was thinking about it because this is actually a fun thing to ponder, but I found that it was easier for me to think of who should play other people than who should portray myself. Perhaps that is because there is no one quite like me? We'll say that's the reason. Anyway when it was my turn, I spouted out some popular actresses like Reese Witherspoon and Jennifer Garner. Basically anyone that already had droves of adoring fans and therefore would make just about everyone want to be me due the fact that they already want to be her. (Confusing sentence?)

But the girl right before me said that she wanted Lucille Ball to play her, and I thought, "Wait, are we allowed to pick dead people?" So after I had given my lame answer, I started thinking through all my favorite classic movies wondering which actress had the right look, the right comedic timing, the right je ne sais quoi that is the essence of . . . me. And I decided that Barbara Stanwyck was my girl.

Until I looked her up the next day and realized that I had associated the wrong name with the actress I was actually looking for.

Jean Arthur. Jean Arthur is my girl.

Wasn't she just lovely?

Even better, she was funny. And that is why I chose her.

Here's a great tribute to telemarketers. I love it, so universal. Although I usually don't get calls offering me furs and jewelry . . . just people asking for money (I love you too, Metropolitan Opera).

Also, I found this picture of her which I think was back when she was in silent films, before the world came to hear that wonderfully quirky little voice of hers and before she bleached her hair blonde. I've taken the liberty to take a similar picture of myself with my handy dandy built-in iSight camera so you can compare. I didn't specifically do my hair for this, but I'm pretty sure it could look like hers if it wanted to. I understand that we don't look exactly alike. I mean, I would hope that as a portrait artist I could see when people have similar features and I admit that we don't really. But she's great and I would still have her portray me in a riveting and hilarious movie version of my life. My life is riveting and hilarious, of course.

A cute young little Jean Arthur.

A cute young little me.

Furthermore, if I got to choose who would play opposite good ol' Jean - and therefore play my love interest - I would emphatically choose Jimmy Stewart. And not just because I've seen them on screen together, but because I have decided that I love to watch Jimmy Stewart. I'm pretty positive that he is my all-time favorite actor. He is so great at what he does. He really reels me in. (Please excuse the terrible pun - it's a really bad habit I've gotten into and I don't know how to stop it. I blame Dr. Gray!) I'm sure some think he's a little goofy, but he's seriously a master of his craft (and he 'ain't bad looking either). Please just watch some of his movies, he's fabulous.

I mean, just look at those eyes!

While we're on the subject, can we talk about classic films? I don't think I've mentioned it before, but I LOVE classic films. I miss the days when writing was clever and girls had gumption while still having grace. You hardly ever see that anymore in the big blockbusters that Hollywood cranks out now. So much of the money is put into explosives and too often the leading women are chosen for their cup size. Ok, so maybe I'm just picking on the Fast & the Furious series, but you have to admit, half of the movies that come out nowadays aren't fit to be seen. Which explains why I hardly ever go to the cinema anymore.

So for those of you who have not had the pleasure of discovering the world of old (I'm counting up through the 1960's) movies, I will list for you some of my favorites. This is by no means a complete list, because there literally hundreds of wonderful movies that I can't even remember right now. Not all of these are black and white and I'm even including some musicals (don't worry boys, I'm putting in some Westerns, too). I'm just going to list the titles as they come to me, so sorry that I'm not dividing them up into genres, but I do need to get a few other things done today besides finally posting on my blog after almost a month of silence (btw, sorry 'bout that). We'll start with some classic Jean Arthur and Jimmy Stewart and go from there.

You Can't Take it With You

Mr. Deeds Goes to Town

Mr. Smith Goes to Washington

It's a Wonderful Life

Vivacious Lady (little known gem w/Jimmy Stewart and Ginger Rogers)

The Philadelphia Story

The Shop Around the Corner

Big Country

To Kill a Mockingbird

The Long Hot Summer (can you say Paul Newman? *drool*)

Cat on a Hot Tin Roof (similar to the above)

Now Voyager

Roman Holiday

The Snake Pit

My Fair Lady

The Sound of Music

Mary Poppins (isn't Julie Andrews mesmerizing?)

Black Narcissus (nun thriller, I kid you not)

An Affair to Remember

North by Northwest

Charade

Wait Until Dark

Rear Window

My Favorite Wife

Swing Time

Holiday Inn

White Christmas

Brigadoon

Seven Brides for Seven Brothers

Singin' in the Rain

McClintock

The Quiet Man

The Searchers

The Longest Day

The Sons of Katie Elder

Arsenic and Old Lace

12 Angry Men

A Letter for Evie

A Place in the Sun

From Here to Eternity

The Taming of the Shrew (w/Elizabeth Taylor & Richard Burton)

The Ten Commandments

Ben-Hur

Lost Horizon

The Barefoot Contessa

Three Coins in the Fountain

That's what I can think of for now. Are there any you would add to the list? Please share, because this list suddenly seems urgent. Like the kind of thing I should have started years ago.

In parting. I've thrown in a few more shots of me a la iSight camera (I may have gotten a little carried away . . . but doesn't everyone have impromptu dress-up photo shoots in front their computer in the middle of the day?). I am a little embarrassed to post pictures of myself. I'm often the one jumping out of the frame when someone is yelling, "CHEESE!". And I've never been that girl who brings her digital camera everywhere to take self-portraits with each of her friends. (You know the shot with their faces squished together and the arm that is holding the camera extended out to the side?) But I couldn't help myself. The temptation to play dress-up was too great and I thought these two turned out to be especially glamorous. I was going for drama Bette Davis style.

By the way, did you know that if you use enough light, your nose almost completely disappears? Fabulous! Should have thought of it years ago. I could have avoided so much teasing in middle school.

Regular Travel

This post is coming to you from the JetBlue terminal of the Long Beach Airport. Can I just say that this is a very small little place? Definitely smaller than my high school gym. Possibly as small as my elementary school gym? The construction is more like the portables, though.

Did you notice how that guy looks like a giant?

Yup it's pretty tight in here.

And when I say tight, I'm not

talking about how awesome it is.

What am I doing here, you ask. Well here it is.

Many moons ago when I was making my travel plans to come home for Christmas, I felt some kind of urgency to get the best deal I could get before prices rose closer to the holidays. So in the aforementioned urgency, I booked a ticket home that took me straight from Salt Lake International Airport to my beloved JFK. At the same time, I apparently booked a return flight that cleverly took me straight from my beloved JFK to Long Beach Airport to Salt Lake International. Wait, what? I'm flying PAST Utah all the way to the opposite coast only to get on another plane so that I can get to Utah? I really don't remember choosing this. I hate layovers and I hate long flights, so I must have been momentarily out of wits when I chose this for myself. But it WAS my choice (so they tell me), so I will live with it.

The first flight wasn't too bad. JetBlue gives you free DirectTV, so I took advantage by bringing along my earbuds. My biggest tender mercy of this trip so far was seeing a rerun of the Closer which I had never seen (How did that even happen? I don't know). That was an hour that went by quickly. After that, I was disappointed to find out that it wasn't a Closer marathon :( I did watch a little bit of the Usher story and a few episodes of Say Yes to the Dress. The rest is a blur. What I do remember was popping Ricola herbal throat drops the ENTIRE time. I'm not even kidding.

You know when you feel the slightest tickle on the side of your throat (this is of course the opposite side as the side that is all sore and has a lump in it because you've had a cold and talked WAY too much in the last couple of days and now you have no voice) and you try not to think about it because you don't want to cough in the middle of sacrament meeting? But the more you try NOT thinking about it, the more you do, so you fumble for a cough drop as the coughing begins, and even after you put the cough drop in your mouth, somehow it doesn't seem to work right away and you're coughing so bad that you are crying? Yeah, that was happening to me today (and also when I was out to dinner last night trying to play it cool). Except this time I wasn't trying to not cough because I didn't want to interrupt church (or look like a dork in front of a really awesome guy). This time, I didn't want to cough because when you cough on a plane, everyone looks at you and thinks to themselves, "you're infecting us all!!!" And I surely didn't want to attract that kind of attention, did I? So I literally consumed a full bag of Ricola herbal throat drops today. Luckily I still have more to cover my next little flight to Salt Lake.

I should mention another tender mercy that I experienced today. I haven't needed to blow my nose like crazy. In fact, I was able to breathe through my nose the entire trip. This is great, of course, because blowing your nose and making those sounds that indicate you probably have some kind of nasty sinus infection also gets people thinking. For the most part, my only tell tale sickness signs were my barely-there raspy smoker's voice and having a tissue on hand for the inconspicuous nose pass.

Also a tender mercy or at least an upside to modern day technology: that even this teeny tiny terminal has WiFi so that I can pass the time by writing a blog post.

So here's to looking at the bright side. I made it thus far without too many problems. And for that I am grateful.

I WOULD like to make a small complaint, though. Why do I have to pay almost $9.00 for a sandwich that tastes like it was made 3 days ago?

Time Travel part 2

I know you're not supposed to look back, but I can't help it. I was cleaning out my inbox. I hate clutter and as I had no where to be today, I decided to go through the task of deleting emails that were no longer relevant. I have a self proclaimed aversion to numbers (I'm pretty sure it's some kind of learning disability), so I really can't remember if I had 3456 or 4892 or some other crazy big number of emails when I got started, but there were a lot. I would like to happily report that there are only 429 left (I know this number is accurate because I didn't have to remember it. It was clearly posted at the bottom of the page of my inbox.)

I created said email account when I was serving my mission in Italy because I had encountered some problems with my BYU email account. Mostly I was just super annoyed that it often wasn't working during the only time out of the whole week when I could check it. Thus was born the hotmail account. Now because of this, I have some emails saved since 2002! Crazy, I know! Especially because I think some of the kids in my ward in Orem may have not even been born yet! I digress . . .

The first step in cleaning out your inbox (especially when you've waited this long) is to just go through and pick out the ones you know you don't even need to read, just delete. Like all the Facebook notifications you used to get before you realized that you could change your settings so that you didn't need to hear every time someone made a comment after you made a comment on someone's photo or status. Also all the recipes you used to get from Martha Stewart (I know she wrote them personally to me) that probably don't even link to the recipe anymore because it hasn't been on the site for a few years.

My next step was to also delete all items related to my former calling as Stake YSA Rep. Can I just say how absolutely LIBERATING that felt?!?! And there was no worry. Now that I live in a completely different place, those emails are totally irrelevant! LIBERATED!!!

The last step on this metaphorical cleaning of the inbox is to go through (and I mean read or at least skim) the rest of the emails and decide if there are anymore that you can delete. This step is, of course, not normally required and is going above and beyond, but if you really want your inbox to be purged, it is necessary. You can read these remaining emails in either order, going from the newest to the oldest or the reverse - it's up to you. I prefer going from oldest to newest because then I feel they make more sense and so I did today.

This is the part where it all started to come together. After my last post, I have been sorta amazed at how time travel has sprouted into a little theme (I'm sure it's temporary) in my life. At least the topic continues to draw attention to itself. The Back to the Future trilogy being shown every night this week? Funny. Weird, even.

I managed to watch all three, though not in the right order (which is a shame). Tonight I was watching the second one (I had already watched the first and third) as I was reading through the emails that made the first couple of cuts. I realized as I watched Marty and Doc go back to 1955 again, that I, myself, was, in a way, traveling through time. Other people just write in their journals, but I'm the kind of lazy that would rather go through all my 3000+ old emails to preserve a record of my life than write directly to my posterity.

Coincidentally, I was also kind of traveling through time by using the DVR to pause when I needed to go to the bathroom etc. and then fast forward through the commercials and eventually, go . . . . back to the future! Unless I was just going back to my present? I dunno . . . I'll tell you what though, if they had shown some kind of DVR technology in the Back to the Future when they go to 2015, I would not have believed it. Think about it! Pausing TV! Rewinding TV! Fast forwarding through annoying commercials! It's ridiculous! Ridiculously AWESOME! I'm a huge fan. Except when someone in my family doesn't know I'm watching something "in the past" (you know, like when you don't plan to record something, you just start watching and the next thing you know you're watching 20 minutes behind the schedule) and changes the channel. Then all is lost! Especially if the show is already over in real time.

So where am I going with all this? Why, I'll share that with you right now!

A couple of things I learned from my trip back in time . . .

1. Internet used to take up your phone line. Not new information, but I had completely forgotten about that.

2. I am funniest when writing to my longtime friend, Jess. I'm not sure what it is about her that brings out the comedienne in me, but in the future *drum/cymbals sound you hear when a cheesy joke is told*, I will try to imagine these blog posts are intended for her so that you can all benefit from her comedic influence on me.

3. My former mission companion, Aleta, will probably never change (which is ok with me). After an update of her life in one of the emails including some details of her difficult first pregnancy, she closed with "you should go to this website farts.com it has fart noises on it." Classic.

4. Most budding relationships come to nothing and quickly, too. I can't even count how many boys I read about from girl friends of mine (most of which are now happily married - the girls, I mean). I had my fair share of crushes that came to nothing. Some of which I had forgotten. Quite a few of these boys couldn't even be counted as a notch in a timeline of our lives. This is great perspective for me.

5. Also, I'm boy crazy. Or at least I was boy crazy. Not a revelation, I know. I just thought it was funny how often my friends asked about boys in emails to me. Pretty much every message asked if there were any "boys" or "hotties" in my life at the respective time or about boys I had mentioned in previous emails. It's just funny how everyone expected it of me.

6. People have a way of coming back into your life. There are two people that I'm thinking of specifically that I haven't seen in a really long time.

One of these people I didn't really expect I'd see again or at least I had decided that I didn't need to ever see him again. Reading through the emails that had survived all these years, I realized that we used to have a really good time together. It was a fun friendship. But I had feelings that weren't reciprocated and basically I wasn't a priority in his life, so in my usual bitter way, I "moved on".

As women, we like to move on because then we feel empowered. I admit that I did. I also did my usual thing of trying to only remember his offenses (this, of course, prevents my regression).

His offenses were pretty legit. He "double booked" our hangout appointments (I don't presume to call them dates) more than once. I was done. Which was fine, until I ran into him a couple of weeks ago. I admit that it was a total curve ball. I had prepared myself to run into a lot of old friends that day at church, but he was not one of them. I pretended it was no big deal as I first encountered him, but I definitely needed to process. In the end, I didn't go about the whole thing in a very friendly way (I left without really saying goodbye) and there isn't anything I can do about it now. In my "moving on" I deleted his number and even his email address. I guess I just wish I could have been a little better behaved. He didn't deserve what he got - a somewhat cold greeting. The truth is that there never could have been a relationship there and I knew it. It was my pride taking the lead and I shouldn't have let it.

The second person is a good friend that I actually haven't seen yet, but if things go as planned, I will be seeing very soon. This old friend never injured me. In fact, I injured him. Tonight, as I reread his messages, I found that he never once acted cold or offended. Always kind, always friendly. Always showing immense respect. On top of that, he's been developing over all these years. Becoming. I can't wait to see how far he's come and get a glimpse of how far he'll go. He truly has been an important example in my life though he's often said the same to me. I'm truly lucky to be crossing paths with him again.

Aaaaaaand . . . there I go talking about boys again.

What I want (and don't want) for Christmas

Greetings blog world! I apologize that I have been absent, but I was busy with drawings and I don't feel one bit sorry about it. Work = money (usually) and I never say no to money (except of course if we're talking about an Indecent Proposal situation - I have more scruples than that.) Aaaaanywho, now I'm on Christmas vacation and I feel perfectly justified blogging as there are no fast approaching deadlines. So here's a little something that I've been dying to share with all of you.

At least a month ago, I came across a piece of paper on my niece's desk as I was walking by. It looked like this:

As you can see, my niece's interests include the top of the line Mac-ware (mostly she likes playing Angry Birds), music, blogging (apparently she wants to tell the world about her exciting 8-year-old life), reading, fashion, and . . . time travel . . . :) I love my niece because she has such a different brain than I did when I was her age (actually, her brain might function at a higher level than mine does presently). Also, I love that she seemed to be just getting started on that list.

What's funny is that we seem to have similar interests, though many of these needs/wants of mine are already fulfilled. I do LOVE Apple products, but I don't have an iPhone and I've pretty much decided that I can live without one (except I love the idea that I could sync my calendar from my computer into my phone so that I wouldn't have to enter everything twice. That would be so awesome!). I already have a radio and an iPod (it may be a first generation nano, but it still works and I love it). I also, as you can clearly see, already have my own blog and even a computer with which to write it. I have plenty of shelf space on which to store books, and I even have a lot of accessories (thanks to a few fetishes and the fact that I lost two grandmothers this summer from whom I inherited jewelry, purses, belts and more).

What I don't have is a time machine. This is ok with me because I have no desire to time travel. Don't get me wrong, I love travel. In fact, I am writing this entry from my parent's home in Connecticut which means that I just traveled. On top of that, I arrived on Thursday morning and left for Boston on Friday. During my visit to the East Coast, I will also be going to New York and DC. So despite having to face the TSA's limited options of dirty pictures or inappropriate groping (I got the dirty pictures) the other day, I'll be doing it three more times in the very near future. All for the sake of seeing interesting places and new things and hopefully meeting a few new people along the way all the while enriching my understanding of the world. Also, it's just fun to get out of the house.

Time travel, on the other hand, is a completely different animal. I mean, think of what you might be getting yourself into. Have you seen Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure? Sure, they got an A on their History report, but they probably messed up history forever. Do you really think Napoleon, Mozart, Joan of Arc, Abe Lincoln, etc., would ever be the same after experiencing the wonder of a mall? And what about Back to the Future? His mom tried to put the moves on him and he almost got himself erased. Furthermore, it seems to me from what I've seen in the movies, that in most instances, time machines aren't very good at "dropping you off" in very convenient or safe places. You always seem to be getting plopped into the middle of a bloody battle or something dangerous like that. Of course you could try to go sans machine, but I heard that in "The Time Traveller's Wife" his clothes would fall off or dematerialize leaving him as bare as the day he was born, which in my opinion is worse than either of the TSA options.

The truth is that I have always found flaws in those time travel movies. Like if Doc was shot in 1885, then wouldn't that mean that he wouldn't have done any of the other stuff in 1955 or 1985? I mean even though he came from 1985, he still DIED in 1885, therefore changing anything that happened after that. Or if the Terminator and the guy (Kyle) that travels back to save Sarah Connor both end up getting terminated in the past, wouldn't that mean that their selves that were in the future would not be in the future anymore? AKA, Kyle wouldn't be able to get the picture from Sarah's son, John, and consequently travel back to save her, because he was already dead. And the Terminator couldn't come back in the sequel to protect Sarah Connor from the even more terrifying mercury-like, morph-into-whatever-he-kills terminator. And even though they try to explain how it all happened in that one Harry Potter movie where Hermione has the fancy necklace thing that helps her skip through time, I still didn't follow the whole thing.

What I'm trying to say here is that it's risky business, because the movies are obviously not telling the story correctly so that means we really don't know WHAT could happen. And even if we did think we had figured it out, we would probably screw up somewhere. I mean if I were Hermione (which I was a few times for Halloween), I would probably show up at the wrong place or forget that the other me was coming and blow the whole operation. What you already did is hard to keep track of, you know? I mean just the other day I spent a full 5 minutes trying to figure out whether or not I had eaten lunch and that was on the same day!

Nope. No time travel for me. Instead I would like . . . hmmmmm (this is real-time thinking, because even though Christmas is this week, I haven't actually thought of something I want) . . . I would like . . . to actually experience mistletoe? (I've never dated anyone in December.) Naah. I have a feeling that a wish like that would result in a creepy old dude taking advantage of the festive flora. Peace on Earth? That's not likely to happen by Saturday. A trip to Europe? I WISH! But I'm pretty sure that's not in Santa's budget.

I guess for now I'll settle for Christmas at home.

Oh wait, I already got that. :)

P.S. - After reading this post, you may be interested in the sweded version of Back to the Future. And if you don't know what a "sweded" version is, then please proceed to your nearest Blockbuster/Hollywood Video/Redbox or go on Netflix and get Be Kind Rewind. You can thank me later.